Disclosure: Affiliate links appear in this post
Over the past couple of weeks, I have had the pleasure of sharing so many brave stories from women all over the nation. They have shared their journey through job changes, motherhood, infertility, and so much more. They have been deep glimpses of women that have a story to tell and women that want to encourage others that bravery is for everyone.
What about those days when you don’t feel so brave though?
What about those days where your mind is running laps around everything that needs to be done and the fact that time is running out to do it all in?
What about those days where you try your best to believe the finances will come through but you look at the groceries and think, “This might be it for a while?”
There are days where our brave faces shed a few tears and even though it has taken some time, I am learning tears do not make me weak, they make me real.
Brave tears are cried out of a place in our heart that is trying so hard to keep things together. We want our children to see us happy not stressing over the bank account dwindling. We smile and nod to our husband that everything is good, we are just tired. We wear a brave face until, sometimes, we just have to let it all out.
Friend, that is perfectly okay.
The month of April has been a financial struggle for our family. In March, we took a step of faith that stretched not only our trust in God but our budgets as well. We no longer had a cushion which meant every penny was going to count.
As April progressed there were days where it affected me so deeply I was weeping to God, “I don’t care if we have food or are taken care of but whatever You have to do take care of my child.”
In my life, I don’t think I have ever prayed a more earnest prayer than that. When you are facing a situation that you cannot see the other side of or even how you are going to get to the other side, you learn what matters most. For me, of course, it was my child.
I remember one day coming home from babysitting and due to some circumstances in the house, I felt completely overwhelmed. My mom had thankfully taken Eleanor to her house and I just stood at the kitchen sink weeping.
I was trying so hard to be brave and keep going, but that day, over those dishes I just began to cry out to God. Brave eyes cry too and sometimes it is because we need to stop trying to be brave on our own.
In that moment of being overwhelmed and feeling beaten, I heard this voice that asked me what was I believing?
What was I believing?
Well, I was believing cupboards looking bare, cars needing gas, pay not coming until the next week. I was believing everything I could see, everything that was crushing me.
Then it was like God’s voice whispered, “But what’s the truth?”
Yes, those were the things I could logically see with my natural eye, but what was the truth.
For me, truth is Jesus and to evaluate what was truth right then and there was the promise that God is my source. He cares for the sparrows, the lilies, every living thing, so how much more does He care for me?
Those tears, over those dishes, broke my bravery and allowed me to embrace God’s bravery.
My concerns for life did not vanish into thin air, but I did begin to identify the lies of logic that were causing me to doubt the truth of Christ.
One of the most powerful ways for me to overcome the lies of the enemy is through worship. The Word is my first source, but as a mom and wife, it is not always easy to stop everything and pull out the Bible to go to war. That is why I turn to my music and pull out the weapon of worship.
My go to song for this season has been “King of my Heart” by John Mark and Sarah McMillan. I turn this song on and I belt it to the top of my lungs because in the midst of what seems like the biggest struggle of my life I want the devil to know I’m declaring God is good and He will never let me go.
As I began to worship and to declare this I noticed my tears were going from sorry to joy. I was slowly beginning to be overwhelmed in a new way. It was no longer the weight of the world or the worries of what we were facing. It was the overwhelming presence of the Father. It was like I could feel Him standing next to me encouraging me and pouring His joy out over my heartache.
It was no longer the weight of the world or the worries of what we were facing. It was the overwhelming presence of the Father. It was like I could feel Him standing next to me encouraging me and pouring His joy out over my heartache.
It was the overwhelming presence of the Father. It was like I could feel Him standing next to me encouraging me and pouring His joy out over my heartache.
Sometimes brave tears turn into sad tears because we are carrying the weight of the world and we were never meant to.
God did not create Mother’s, wives, women to carry it all. No way.
He sent His Son to carry those things for us. His yoke is easy and His burden is light all we have to do is take His peace and allow ourselves to surrender to the fact that He is the brave one, not us.
If you are having one of those sink moments where you are weeping and crying out to God because you feel like you just can’t do it anymore I want to reach out, grab your hand, look into your eyes and say, “I am proof that you can do this, don’t give up. We’ll cry together and then we’ll grab the hand of the Father and find peace.”
Tears are not an indicator that we are weak or bad Mothers or bad wives. They simply indicate we are sometimes trying to do too much. Let the tears come, but allow them to point you to the true brave One. He will carry you through.
Some days there are tears, most days there are dishes, but every day we can trust the promises of God for our lives.
Live the Lovely
(And hold on, we can do this)